Category Archives: comedy

Frotcast Bonus: ‘Captain America: Brave New World,’ with Joey Devine

comedy, movies, , , , , ,

Joey Devine from Roundball rock joins the Frot to discuss Captain America: Brave New World, one of the weirdest movies either of us have ever seen. It’s hard to get Brendan and Matt to watch movies anymore, but that’s why I have friends who don’t have kids!

Anyway, Marvel movies. They suck now. We haven’t liked one in a long time. And yet we still see them. God knows why. Might as well, at this point! This one was a movie in which character are always discussing other, better, more-well-known characters who clearly had better things to do than be in this one. Why bring them up then! It makes no sense!

Joey and I try to make sense of what this movie was supposed to be like before the four reshoots, which scenes they clearly filmed before they actually knew what it was going to about, what characters would’ve made sense if we’d seen the Winter Soldier TV show, and the complicated geopolitics of it all. Why are the four countries battling for control of the adamantium the US, India, France, and Japan? How did Bucky Barnes end up running for Senate? Didn’t he kill Iron Man’s parents? And how exactly did World War II end in this universe? Also why is one of the characters an Israeli little person?

If you have answers to any of these questions please slide into the comments, we’re genuinely curious.

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[Teaser] Wake up and drink the piss (Frotcast 622, with Jason Webb)

comedy, movies, , , ,

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This week, comedian/haberdasher Jason Webb joins the Frotboiz to discuss natural disasters, Trump, and why he doesn’t trust his crawl space. Matt shares the riveting tale of a periwinkle blue corduroy hat he wore this one time.

Next up, Elon Musk is ruining all the potential whimsy of a second Trump administration. If there’s one thing the public has been clamoring for, it’s to let the senile mummies in charge of our country cook!

We also listen to a clip of Trump finally realizing his true calling of becoming a catty Broadway producer via a hostile government takeover of the Kennedy Center. BOFFO BARRON BLOWS UP BOND MARKET!

Finally, we wrap up with a discussion of this week’s shocking Jew-on-Jew crime in Florida. This antisemitism stuff has gone too far!!! At least we can take solace in the fact that neither perpetrator nor victim will learn a single fucking thing from all this.

See more of Jason’s work on Instagram @uhhhjasonwebb

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UNLOCKED – Frotcast 618: The Inhuman Centipede, w Ed Zitron

comedy, movies, ,

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Fresh from the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas, we welcome PR professional, tech shitposter, computer lover, and British Guy Ed Zitron. Ed brings us up to speed on what he saw there. We talk about the stagnation of the tech industry and why everything has to have AI in it, whether we want it or not. Spoiler alert: they’re probably out of ideas.

Double spoiler alert, you can’t fuck the robots. Yet.

Ed also touches specifically on OpenAI, which is currently losing billions of dollars a year by making its lake-boiling plagiarism aggregator generate pics of bimbofied Squidward for bored thirteen year olds. Software is eating the world, indeed.

We also pour out some Mountain Dew Game Fuel for the only good website, Google Reader. RIP to a real one.

We round things out by talking about Elon’s Nazi ahem ROMAN salute. Hey, can I talk to you for a minute? Thanks. Look, we all know what we saw. Feel free to disregard anyone else who tries to tell you otherwise. Personally, I’m going to ignore him because this is just teen edgelord shit, and the only thing teen edgelords enjoy more than a Nazi salute is watching people get upset about a Nazi salute. Sell your Tesla though for real.

Bye!

-Description by Brendan

 

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Frotcast 617: The Bullshit Asymmetry Economy, w/Chris Thompson

comedy, movies, , , , , ,

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Hey Frotfans, (spins chair around backwards) before we get started on today’s episode, please consider donating to Matt’s sister’s GoFundMe, as she and her family unfortunately lost everything in the recent LA wildfires.

Our guest this week is Chris Thompson from Defector, who joins us to talk about his piece investigating a mysterious Chinese concrete company-turned-metaverse provider called Color Star. This one’s got everything, folks; intrigue, alleged fraud, Spanish soccer legend David Villa, press releases, former NBA point guard Mo Evans, shady middlemen, the Philadelphia 76ers, and to top it all off, Ohio. And don’t forget the documents. Oh, so many documents.

His investigation tries to answer the question: what if a company was a concrete manufacturer that also launched a metaverse product but was also, also a concrete manufacturer. Does he succeed? We’re not really sure. Just be careful of people who amass photos of themselves with celebrities, ok?

Matt also cleans out his closet, both metaphorically a la Eminem, and literally a la Matt.

Find Chris at Defector.com and nowhere else online, for the love of God. As always, thanks for listening, like, subscribe, comment, contribute to the GoFundMe and Frot on!

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UNLOCKED – Frotcast 613: CEOwned, with Ben Fowlkes

comedy, movies, , , ,

PLEASE SIGN UP ON PATREON, EVEN IF IT’S FOR FREE! Posting everything here has become a burden, and if you’re only listening to this feed you probably aren’t getting all of the episodes. Patreon dot com slash frotcast! This episode is free, but Patreon subscribers saw it earlier. 

We welcome longtime MMA writer Ben Fowlkes (Uncrowned, the Co-Main Event Podcast) onto the show to discuss the bouquet of assaults, both sexual and conventional, that Conor McGregor has committed recently. It appears as if he went method for his role as a coked-up maniac in Road House and then just got stuck like that or something.

Next up, we talk about the United Health CEO getting murked on a sidewalk in Manhattan. Murder is very bad, but also so is letting people die to keep your company’s stock price high? Idk. However you feel about it is valid and don’t be smarmed into thinking otherwise.

Other topics include:

  • Noted Expert On Stuff Sean Penn weighing in on Hunter Biden
  • Spotify’s top podcasts (no Frotcast or Pod Yourself? Bullshit!)
  • Jeff Bezos using his app, which has been downloaded by hundreds of millions of people, to send a push notification promoting his girlfriend’s book.
    • Maybe it’s just a really good children’s book, despite her never having written a book before, and the subject being…a fly who…flew to space.
    • Fuck. This fucking sucks, man.
      • Fuck.

Check out Ben Fowlkes’ work on X THE EVERYTHING APP @benfowlkesMMA and on Yahoo Sports. Frot on!

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[Teaser] The Clown Union of Reaganators, ft Zack Chapaloni

comedy, movies, , , , , , ,

PLEASE SIGN UP ON PATREON, EVEN IF IT’S FOR FREE! Posting everything here has become a burden, and if you’re only listening to this feed you probably aren’t getting all of the episodes. Patreon dot com slash frotcast! Sign up at Patreon to listen to this episode.

Zack Chapaloni takes time out from his busy improv schedule to join us for a robust “yes-and” of Mark Wahlberg and Halle Berry’s new madcap shooting spree comedy The Union. That’s not really a joke; in between witty bon mots, Halle Hal and Marky Mark rack up a body count on par with Legionnaire’s Disease. Brendan forgets JK Simmons’ name and decides to refer to him thenceforth as JK Rowling. Matt watched about half the movie and we come to the conclusion that he really didn’t miss that much. This is an AI-ass movie, y’all. We also discuss the baffling end credits sequence and whether or not this is simply the logical result of stan culture vs. “wanting to see a good movie” (spoiler: it is).

Vince wanted to save his takes on ‘Reagan,’ the new biopic about our most AI-ass president, until the rest of us could see it, but he had to take his shirt off and go in anyway. We challenge some fundamental assumptions of the movie such as: since when does he get credit for ending the Cold War, and why should any American particularly give a shit? Plus! A helpful guide to recognizing Gorbachev in the movie if you don’t have a helpful geriatric to loudly whisper THAT’S GORBACHEV in your theater.

If you like what you heard from our esteemed guest, find Zack on his website here. Even if you didn’t you probably should, we are all desperate.

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Top Chef Frotcast Post-Show S1E6, ‘Guess Who…’ w David J. Roth

comedy, food, TV,

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David J. Roth from Defector and The Distraction joins Vince and Joey this week to discuss season 1, episode 6 of Top Chef, “Guess Who’s Coming for Dinner,” with guest judge Ted Allen!

This episode could’ve been alternately titled “Miguel’s Terrible, No Good, Very Bad Day” as it started with Miguel feeling like the whole world was against him, then he put Palmolive in the dishwasher, and then he put salt instead of sugar in his dessert, and then he ended up at judge’s table, and finally he finished things off by calling Tiffani “A snake. SSSSSS” one of the all-time most memorable Top Chef trailer clips.

Dave cried red-faced into his wine glass and lots of other stuff happened too, but the important thing is that Andrea is finally gone. My God, it feels like it took forever, didn’t it? it seemed like someone else was about to get sent home, but Andrea, who thought she was above this competition all along, basically decided to fall on her sword instead, making up some dumb bullshit about green onions on her way out. Much like Joe Biden, the best thing she did was to leave the stage. Good riddance, Andrea! Have fun pooping!

Check out our sponsor at BlackwoodDistillingCo.com.

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[Teaser] The Olympics of Fast Food, w James Fritz (Frotcast 599)

comedy, movies, ,

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James Fritz joins us in the virtual stu’ (it was supposed to be a real stu’ but Matt got a widdle sniffle). Listen as we drop bar after bar of the tightest flows ever etched on wax! YOU CRAZY FOR THIS ONE RICK!!

We uphold Frotcast tradition by going completely off the rails before we even get started. James asks Matt if he’s “a jingle man” and sends Brendan on a 20-minute reverie involving Jack Nicholson menacingly asking a guy named Matt tied to a chair if he’s “a jingle man”.

Come along with us as we discuss the ancient ideals still held forth by the purity of the Olympic Games and the eternal glory plus unlimited colonoscopies conferred upon its champions. When in Rome, indeed.

Listen as we take in the Veep-iness of Linda Yaccarino’s video in which she outlines the lawsuit Twitter is bringing against advertisers who don’t want to spend money with them. There’s also some good Louis CK “your father is dead” vibes with the hand gestures. She’s going to make a great politician. I personally cannot wait for Twitter to win this lawsuit so every company in America will be forced to spend money there, a thing that will DEFINITELY happen.

Brendan leaves soon after that because his son won’t nap and Matt gets big mad about Zionism. Idk, I think reggae is pretty cool but whatevs.

See nudes of James Fritz at his website: https://www.jamesfritzcomic.com/

Frot on!

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Frotcast Top Chef Post-Show S1E3: ‘Nasty Delights’

comedy, food, TV, ,

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Joey and Vince are back talking about season 1 of Top Chef. This week we’re talking about season one, episode 3 (103), “Nasty Delights,” which really is a fantastic Top Chef episode and quite possibly a big reason we still have this show 21 seasons later. Stephen Asprinio deserves his place in the Top Chef hall of fame. All-time great reality show character. The chefs had to make octopus, and then they had to make monkfish for little kids. Crazy how this episode turned out, because some people who went on to become food TV royalty probably should’ve gone home this episode. Justice for Brian! (Or, maybe not, maybe he deserved it).

For some delicious bourbon and rye, check out our sponsor, blackwooddistillingco.com.

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[Teaser] Matt’s Terrible, No Good, Very Bad Day (Frotcast 597)

comedy, movies, , ,

PLEASE SIGN UP ON PATREON, EVEN IF IT’S FOR FREE! Posting everything here has become a burden, and if you’re only listening to this feed you probably aren’t getting all of the episodes. Patreon dot com slash frotcast! To listen to the full version of this podcast and all other premium podcasts sign up at Patreon.

This week on the Frotcast, Matt comes to us live from his very stressful trip to San Francisco where his car broke down in the middle of the freeway on the way to do some comedy. He ended up all sweaty up there. Our guest this week is Ryan Nanni, aka Celebrity Hot Tub, author of Assigned and co-host of the Shut Down Fullcast. Matt tells us all about his trip, we talk about JD Vance stealing Joe Sinclitico’s Frotcast bit and having sex with couches, plus we review JD Vance’s crowdwork about Diet Mountain Dew. Eventually we get around to talking about ‘Love Lies Bleeding,’ the lesbian bodybuilding movie starring Kristen Stewart I made everyone watch for some reason. Basically imagine Pain & Gain with lesbian bodybuilders. Or maybe Thelma & Louise with lesbian bodybuilders. It’s actually a bunch of things that sound intriguing and yet none of those things at all because it doesn’t feel like they finished writing it.

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